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You can't turn back the hands of time.

"Sometimes. hits me in the morning, hits me at night  That I cannot turn back the years  So I look out my window, turn off my light  But I cannot turn back the years"   Phil Collins     Everyone wishes they can turn back the hands of time on some event in their lives, this is especially true for those who suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Where a certain event or series of events in that persons life has caused so much trauma that it literally changes their lives forever.     For me, I live this dream on a daily basis as I cannot escape the effects that these events has had on me ever since I was a child. Turning back the clock would only be a dream come true, however which point to turn it to I could not even begin to figure out. My memories go so far back that they become distorted to the point of confusion putting events into a single timeline. What I thought may have happened at five years old, may have actually happened at eight years
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Gave my mind a rest and got creative.

       Tonight I was feeling all but depressed again, I don't know why again but it was just another down day. As I sat here looking at all the Tweets on Twitter I realized I was not really thinking, I was just reading along. I don't follow to many people and not to many follow me just yet so I flipped over to Facebook to play a few games to keep my mind moving. I find when I am depressed I don't think a whole lot and I only want to lay down and just sleep. I really don't care if I eat or not, I just don't want to move.        So, instead of just blogging about how I felt which I could very well have done I decided to get a little creative and make a power point presentation. My mind was running in such overdrive that I could not keep my thoughts onto one topic. A first for me since I started my blog yet not the first time since February 12th. When I was last in the hospital for 3 weeks, they had crafts 3 times a week and I remembered how I felt when I did those. T
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No, it's not just a myth anymore.

     In most all my blogs I have written I start to write about something and then take it into an educational kind of post, giving stats, studies and basically information about the topic I am writing about. Just like my last post, I started with how I was depressed and led into how depression works. Just like I am some type of professional on the subject when in fact everything is my own thoughts on things I have read put into my own words from memory. No, I do not just read on a subject and type about it, I just open the subject and let my mind work from there.      Tonight I just need to type my thoughts and feelings down on paper, or in blog form, to kind of get things off my head. I guess that is what I intended this blog to be about, the path I was taking to recover from my illness and put in out there for others to read to help them know they are not alone. But looking back, most posts are more informational then anything else. There really is not a lot of pages where it disc
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