Just a few thoughts.

            Today is Sunday afternoon and I am still in the hospital going for my second ECT in the morning. This evening they will come and put the IV Stint in where they placed the meds to put me to sleep. I think this time I am going to stop having anything to eat or drink after 7 PM this time. Now that I know what to expect I know just what to expect and what not to expect. We shall see.

 
Photobucket            Yesterday I went home on an eight hour pass, which was good to see the kids have not changed a whole lot. Wish they would step up and help their mother, especially when they know that Daddy is coming home for a visit. I was happy to see the driveway done from all the snow. I did not know we had that much snow on the ground and they are expecting much more over the next couple days. It’s the possibility of Freezing Ice that I did not go home on a pass today and the Doctor asked if I wanted to stay until Wednesday because of the bad weather we are suppose to get on Monday. It is so uncommon that a Doctor not only cares about the problem you are having but takes in to consideration the family who has to pick you up, he actually asked if I wanted to have family drive in the snow. He said we can decide when we know better when Monday comes around and we get a better idea what the weather is going to be.

            Last night I had a pretty bad night sleep, I think it had to do with the one argument I had with one of the nurses who was coming across that we all had a choice in our past and how our past was played out. Not exactly something that you tell a survivor or someone who is on a road to recovery. I also noticed 3 other patients in the room who were very bothered and upset, two walked out and the other and I stayed because I was upset and angry over what was being said. I was not going to put up with what this guy was saying after finally getting over the fact that I I was not to blame and I did not ask for this. I was not going to head back to thinking this, I was not going to regress on that thinking.

            Today I am also having a problem with some memory issues, more so then normal. I seem to forget things that happened a few minutes ago to a couple days ago. I don’t know if it is the drop in the meds, or change in the meds that has caused it or if the ECT has caused a little memory problems. At this point I am not really sure. I guess after Monday’s treatment I will get a better grip on if the memory is from the ECT or if it is more medication related.

            Well, I did not get a chance to write yesterday so I thought I would sit down and put down a few thoughts into text. I plan to do a blog tonight and see just how things go, see if I can remember my whole day or if there will be a lot more blank spots or gaps along the way. So I will continue this later in the evening. Until Next Time….

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